I do not know how many of you are on Facebook. If you are, though, you may have noticed lots of women have a color as their status update. This supposed to be their bra color. The premise behind this is to help make more awareness for Breast Cancer. I will go on record as saying, there was a huge sadness in my heart to see so many woman participate in this “meme”. First, I will state my reason then I will post the comments of two very wonderful, striving to be holy, men and their takes on the subject.
My bra color is only to be known to my husband. Other men do not need to know what color bra I am wearing, nor for that fact, do other women. I know, just reading colors, I pictured what sort of a bra that my woman friends are wearing. Not in a sexual way, just in a “hmmm, wonder what that looks like?”. However, for some men who are reading this status update, this is a slippery slope. We cannot know what is in other’s hearts and where their struggles lie. If they are trying to live a chaste life, knowing the colors of the bras that their female friends may send them down that slope to unchastity.
Now from the two wonderful, striving to be holy men:
Consider this: By telling people the color of your own undergarments, you are effectively saying to them, “it’s okay for you to think of me in a way that only my spouse or someone in my same-sex locker room should see.” Effectively, you set yourself up to be objectified.
In addition, I see it as an offense against many men who, in this day and age are struggling horribly to maintain a chaste lifestyle. As a priest, I can tell you the number of men whose confessions I’ve heard who are struggling with sex addictions. It is hell. What this whole deal has done is spurred their curiosity: “What’s the color thing about?” The whole secrecy thing makes it worse. Then the guy knows. And then he starts to think and imagine…and about people he never would have thought of otherwise.
The man quoted above, is a priest, as stated in his comments. He hears the confessions of the men struggling with purity. He knows how a simple trip to the grocery store to pick up milk can turn in to an assault on a man and his struggle for that purity. He also hears the confessions of the woman affected by the man’s struggle for purity. He knows how much one little slip can cause damage that can take time to heal.
If you don’t realize the trouble that mentioning undergarment color can cause for perfectly healthy and normal men (not to mention the majority who are less than perfectly healthy and normal), you’ve got a bit of studying up to do.
It is *not* just a color – it’s a reference to a very personal and sacred part of humanity that shouldn’t be opened up to the general public. Otherwise, why do we wear clothes at all?
The above quote is the response of another man (not a priest) to those who might say “It is just a bra color, it is not a big deal”.
Breasts themselves are not bad, in fact, they are very good. They are an important part both the feeding of a children and the intimate relationship of a husband and a wife. It is that desire for an intimate relationship between man and woman that can lead to curiosity about a woman’s breasts.Â Curiosity, if not mastered, can lead to unchaste acts, be it the viewing of pornography or inappropriate actions with a woman.
Women, in particular, need to be aware of how their actions can and do affect men. The simple act of sharing your bra color with your 187 friends on Facebook may seem like just a way to support breast cancer awareness, but it can also open up that curiosity and lead to unchaste acts.